


All We Do is Lie and Wait

by Somekindofflower



Series: Come to Me, My Sweetest Friend [5]
Category: ER (TV 1994)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Male Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 14:22:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18500800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Somekindofflower/pseuds/Somekindofflower
Summary: Prompt fill: Luka and Carter on a bro date bump into Abby and Jake on a date.Luka and Carter are hanging out, after Carter's breakup with Wendall, and they both mope over the state of their love lives.





	All We Do is Lie and Wait

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Irishcanary](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Irishcanary).



> I wanted this to be sort of funny, but these stubbornly dramatic men went and got a lot of feelings in it. So this is mostly mutual angst on both their parts. Set in season 11, sometime after episode fifteen.
> 
> Also, this is very close to an AU I'm planning (which starts in eleven with Carter and Luka on a bro date), so if you see similarities later, that's why!

 

“So are you two actually over?” Luka shoves the last bite of burger in his mouth after the question. He’s been bugging Carter for a while to get out and have a beer with him, and now it’s not like he has anything else to do.

Carter dips a cold fry in ketchup and chews it before answering. “Yeah. She won’t even talk to me. Not after she told me she loves me and I ordered a pizza.”

“You ordered a _pizza_?”

“Yeah.” Carter cringes at the memory of that whole night. It hadn’t been his brightest moment. “Then we were in bed when Kem called and I talked to her like Wendall wasn’t even there. She took off.”

It’s a credit to their friendship that Luka manages to keep a straight face (barely, but Carter is thankful for it) at that information. “Wow.”

“It was a dick move, I know. I apologized, but I can’t say it back. It’s not true. I _like_ Wendall. She’s fun, we get along, and I really, really like her. I don’t know why that isn’t enough anymore.”

“Do you think she can get past it?”

Carter shakes his head. "It doesn't seem like it. I mean, at least I didn’t call her the wrong name, but it was still pretty bad.”

Luka scoots a fry around his nearly empty plate a little too intently. “Oh no, you did that? When?”

“It was…don’t worry about it, just be glad you didn’t do that.”

“No. But I guess I have to respect that she wants more than I can give.”

“Yeah.”

That’s enough about him, this is doing the opposite of helping his melancholy.

“Sooo, how’s Sam? Things going any better there?”

“Nope.” He pauses and Carter takes him in, knowing he won’t say more, but then he does. “She says I’m not happy and I never talk.”

“Are you happy?”

As far as talking, it’s not news that Luka isn’t open. Carter gets it now, though. Losing a child isn’t something that can be expressed in words.

As far as Luka being happy? Now that Carter thinks of it, Sam has a point. Luka has been busy with Sam and Alex since last summer and Carter’s had plenty of his own…stuff…going on. So maybe he just hasn’t noticed, but he can’t remember the last time he saw Luka genuinely smile.

“Of course I’m happy.”

Carter almost laughs at the obvious lie coming from his friend’s miserable face, but it’s too damn sad.

“I don’t like to talk about my past, I don’t see what good it does to dredge it up all the time.”

It’s like poking an open wound, Carter gets it. “Yeah. Of course, you did invite ME out to talk.”

“That’s different. You understand. You won’t use it as a weapon for why I shouldn’t have more children.”

“What?” Anger shoots through him. Is Sam seriously doing that? Ouch. Talk about kicking a man where it hurts.

“She doesn’t think she wants more kids. She didn’t think I wanted them. Doesn’t think I SHOULD want them.”

“Oh,” Carter can’t help the understatement or his wince. But seriously, is she blind? Carol, Nicole, Sam and Alex. Sam hasn’t witnessed as much history, but she’s seen him with kids in the ER. It’s practically tattooed on his face how much he wants to be a dad again, more than he even wants to find a woman to spend his life with. To be fair, that might be part of the problem.

Come to think of it, Abby is probably the only person Luka’s ever loved enough to be with, without needing to have kids.

Speak of the devil, just then the door opens and in Abby walks. She’s arm-in-arm with Jake, laughing loud, and both Luka and Carter turn. The couple is deep in conversation (she’s teasing him about something, Carter can tell from the smirk) and Jake is looking at her like she’s the best thing since sliced bread. He’s less sure of her feelings, but it’s good to see her happy, and he smiles. Until he looks over at Luka and sees the thunderstruck look on his face.

Uh-oh.

Luka stares down at the table before taking a long swig of his drink.

“They’re dating?”

Well, this is awkward. Thankfully, neither Jake nor Abby have noticed the two of them, sitting in the back corner as they are. Running into two exes on a date wouldn’t be an ideal situation, no matter how good of friends they are now.

“It’s inappropriate,” Luka complains with the judgment thick in his tone.

Carter chokes down a laugh and sets his beer bottle down before he can take a sip. Better not to risk it shooting up his nose. The waitress comes and takes their plates, and he’s grateful for the well-timed interruption.

“What? It is.” Luka grits out and Carter can’t help the chuckle that escapes.

“We both know you don’t give a damn about what’s appropriate.”

Luka looks away from him before scoffing and taking a long drink.

“It looks bad, she’s only an intern. It could hurt her career.”

Technically, it could look bad for both of them, but at least Luka isn’t pretending he cares as much about Jake.

“Nah, they’ve been smart about it. He switched to shadowing Neela and he’s not even doing an ER rotation anymore.”

“You KNEW about this?”

“Yeah. Everybody knows.”

“ _I_ didn’t know.”

“Susan knows, Kerry knows, they’re fine.”

Kerry fussed at them a bit, so he’d heard, but she didn’t give them an ultimatum. That’s as close to approval as they can get from her. Susan had laughed her ass off telling him about it, so they’re definitely okay on that end.

Luka harrumphed. “Why didn’t I know?”

“I don’t know.”

It’s on the tip of Carter’s tongue to say that if Luka wasn’t avoiding Abby, he would know what’s going on in her life. Why is that? Is that her choice or his? The previous year, they’d still been friends, before…before Kem left. When he first got back from Africa, he’d been convinced Luka and Abby were on their way back together. He saw how Abby looked at Luka, really _saw_ it for the first time without the filter of jealousy, and he’d been convinced she was in love, again, or maybe even…still.

Then, Sam had happened, and she’d surprisingly stuck. Not that he doesn’t LIKE Sam, but she and Luka don’t quite fit. It’s like instead of smoothing each other’s rough edges they just cut each other up. That sounds like it’s on its last legs anyway. Maybe they can work it out. If he’s honest, he hopes they don’t. If they do work it out, at least one of them will be settling. He recognizes it.

Wendall is right. He’s pining for Kem—he’s been pining for her the whole time. He had needed to know that his life wasn’t over because of Joshua and because Kem had left, and that wasn’t fair to Wendall. It seems like Sam might be to Luka what Wendall is to Carter.

He ought to be more surprised by that.

“Aren’t we a pair? It’s a good thing you promised not to cheer me up tonight.”

Luka finally laughs at that, quietly, but it’s a small win. “Cheering isn’t really my strength. And if you want romantic advice, you’re better off with someone—probably anyone—else, you know that.”

If anything, Carter is only more depressed, but at least he’s not depressed _and_ eating cold leftovers alone. Now he’s hurting for the both of them. “What would you say if I did ask?”

Luka rolls his eyes. “Very funny.”

“No, really.”

Scoffing, Luka gives in with a shrug. “I’d say you should make sure she knows you love her. Tell her, but more, show her. That way, if it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know you did what you could.”

That’s really great advice. Also, scary as hell and unspecific advice that Carter isn’t really sure how to follow. But, he’ll keep thinking and he’ll keep trying. He doesn’t want to, well, end up like his friend here. He’d love to return the favor, but he’s meddled before and that hadn’t gone well for ANY of them.

Still…

“Which woman are we talking about here?”

“Kem,” Luka huffs. “The one you’re in love with. You care about Wendall, but you can’t love her, you can’t love anyone else. It wouldn’t be fair to either of you.”

Luka’s right, but Carter is tempted to ask if he _hears_ what he’s saying. He’d also like to retort that’s the pot calling the kettle black, but the following explanation of the saying itself would lose the actual point.

Before he can decide, Abby’s laugh floats back to them again and he watches Luka’s face as he restrains himself from looking. The regret that flickers in his eyes is gone in a split-second, but Carter can taste the bitterness of it in the back of his own throat.

He clears his throat. “Well, I’ve got to go. Kem said she might call before my shift tomorrow, and it’s getting late.” He grabs his jacket and stands up as he slips it on. “I’ll give your advice some thought. I think it’s pretty decent, actually.”

Luka waves him off as Carter reaches for his wallet. “My treat this time.”

“Okay, I’m just going to head out the side exit then.” He smirks at the thought of mischievously interrupting Abby’s date, but he isn’t actually that cruel. “You, uh, might want to think about following your own advice.”

There’s no mirth at all in the smile Luka barely conjures. “I think it’s a little late for that.”

His own answering smile is just a touch brighter. “I don’t think it’s too late, not if it’s meant to be.”

A noncommittal murmur and a “See you later,” are his only response.

As he heads out the door, Carter hopes as hard as he can for both their sakes that he’s right.

 


End file.
